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E3 2010 Predictions, Since I'm So Good At Them
Ice King, Adventure Time
First off, I have no insider information, and I am certainly no Pachter, but I have an inkling of what the conference will incur, and not incur, if you know what I mean.

I'm going to start with the platforms and companies I am least familiar with:

Microsoft/XBox 360

  • The XBOX 720 is announced. Yeah, I can't type that with a straight face either.
  • Natal will probably be the forefront of the presentation, hopefully showing something other than "Creepy Kid Software for Pedophiles Extravaganza". One site suggested a goalie application which could both tie in well with the World Cup and show off the capabilities of the Natal well.
  • Halo spinoff. Probably some Reach or whatever the next iteration is called.
  • Portal 2 will be there and GlaDOS will be presenting the material. I would love to see Half Life 2 Episode 3, but the likelihood of Valve showing off two powerful IPs in the same year would both be stupid and unlikely.
  • Speaking of, XBox handheld. Interesting in concept, but unlikely at best.


  • The PSP2 is announced, with dual analog nubs and downloadable PS2 titles that will be released about two a month.
  • Some Final Fantasy of Square property will probably show up.
  • "Premium" service for people who have money to burn
  • More on whatever the motion detection is called. Was it Move?
  • God of War: Some Kinda Game TBA.
  • No acknowledgment of PSP Go failure.

Other Third Party Stuff

  • Some kind of band hero crap.
  • Some kind of DJ "hero" crap.
  • Keyboard for rock band crap.
  • Announcement of a band specific crap game.
  • The Sims 4, now with humping dogs AND people.
  • Seriously, if we get Left 4 Dead 3, I'm gonna go nuclear on Valve's forums.
  • Doubtful - Plants Vs. Zombies 2 mention.
  • Peripheral Hero crap.
  • Movie license games that are going to be "different" and "not suck".


  • The 3DS, hopefully with some kind of software demo. Hey, wouldn't it be cool if they showed us "Mario 128" on there, in 3D?
  • Probably some first party headliner game to christen the 3DS. Maybe a new or remixed 3D Mario game?
  • Nintendo maaaaaay show some third party support in way of trailers.
  • Fiscal information that no one cares about.
  • Zelda Wii, now with motion plus and Miyamoto interaction.
  • The Kirby franchise gets some kind of love. Supposedly the Gamecube platforming game is now being scrapped and developed for the Wii.
  • I better see something resembleing Star Fox there...
  • Metroid Other M will star Samus and Ridley in a buddy film.
  • Maybe a new platform for the Virtual Console. Something obscure, like Amiga or CDi or something, hopefully less sucky than those suggestions.
  • Virtual Handheld. It better happen.
  • Probably won't happen this year, if ever, but maybe a portable Smash Bros. game.
  • Sonic colors!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.............yeah.
  • Cammie continues to embarrass herself.
  • Nintendo's lone contribution to the Wiiware/DsiWare market.


I just realized that I never have posted my hopes for the 3DS, the successor of the DS hardware family. I posted on the initial specs but not my personal hopes for the handheld. Here is what I would love to see with the 3DS.

  • At least Gamecube-powerful graphics. Rumor has it that the 3DS will actually rival the PS3 and XBOX 360 in power, but I find that extremely hard to believe.
  • Smash Bros on the 3DS. I know I mentioned it earlier, but it begs to be said about 1,000 more times.
  • Analog nub. No more D-pad-only control scheme.
  • Backwards compatibility with entire DS library except Guitar Hero and Band Hero. Heh heh.
  • A Star Wars hologram game. Seriously, the future is now.
  • Virtual Handheld. Seriously, why hasn't this happened yet? I know Ninty has been sucking on the Virtual Console as of late, but when you have gems like Pokemon, WarioWare, and Kirby that are begging for a retro revival, you have to wonder why they haven't started it up yet.
  • Better App Store - With more updates, a revamped store (Seriously, the DSi store is freaking hard and clunky to navigate), and more Nintendo interaction. March of the Minis didn't do it for me.
  • Maybe a way to transfer some WiiWare/Virtual Console titles to the 3DS.
  • Unify someone's account. Seriously, who thought that having "DSi Points" and "Wii Points" as separate accounts was a good idea. I want my balance to be universal, not different from console to console.
  • A way to re-download titles if your handheld gets swiped or busted. I've had that happen before, and I'm scared to take my DSi anywhere because of that. Ironic, scared to take my handheld anywhere.

And those are my predictions and wishlist for E3 2010. I think its best to remind everyone who reads this to not get your hopes up. I know I won't see but about 10% of what I mention on here, and I've accepted that. I hope some interesting things come like a bolt from the blue, but remember Nintendo's 2008 conference, Wii Music and all. Yeah. We are still in a down economy and developers are dropping like flies and won't be taking as much risk for the time being, so expect to see more of the same. So what are your hopes and dreams for E3 2010?

If a new Smash Bros of any kind is announced, I will be fanboying like there's no tomorrow.

The Allengator


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