name: Das Alleingatur
nickname: The Know Nothing Bozo
Siblings: How about too many to mention?
What are you wearing right now? You are a sick, deprived person.
Birthdate: Who cares?
Zodiac sign: Uranus
sex: When I'm married, yes.
Righty or lefty: I have a special 3rd arm that I use in case of emergency.
Favorite Sports: Finding a girl
Artists or bands?: Andy Warhol, Rubber
what car's do you wish you had?: Yours
Favorite subjects in school: Study Hall
CD or TAPE?: I invested in a CD, but I never heard of a TAPE before.
Animals you have: The people that live in Marshtown
Bungee Jumped? Doing as we speak.
Broken the law: Just don't look in my car trunk...
Made yourself cry to get outta trouble? Funny story. One time, I was being robbed, so I cried, and the guy ended up being my boss. Heh. Heh.
First Thing That Comes To Mind: I want to make out with a girl!
Cow: Really innapropriate squeezing.
ON GIRLS FOR GUYS TO FILL OUT (for guys only): is this a question?
Regular underwear or thong: I prefer clothes.
Painted nails or not: Hammered nails.
Cute n' mysterious or wild n' sexy: Cute n' Sexy
Dressy or casual: Yes, I prefer them to be dressed.
Dark or blonde hair: Red
Long or short hair: Depends where it is....
Accent or Canadian: Canadians have their own accent
FIVE PARAGRAPH ESSAY TIME!!!!!!!!!!
Canada: They Started a Country, and Nobody Came
A Five Paragraph essay by the Allengator
Canada was founded by the French and English, so thusly became a dialect in Moron and Stupid, respectively. Over time, the French became smart and realized that they were no longer in France. They were right, but to make certain, they decided to add "eh?" to the end of every sentence.
This accent has also been influencing America, their busom-buddy-next-door-neighbor type country. Minnesota is an example of this. Yeah, Republicans complain about the fact that English is no longer the major language of this country (I'm looking at you, Tancreedo!), and have been attacking the Spanish and Mexicans. I firmly believe they should be attacking the Canadians.
Canada also started Moose tracking and Hockey to the sports realm. While Hockey became a major Olympic sport, moose tracking did not. The Canadians have since been bitter about this, and have been rude to people in England, mostly because Equestrian sports were added to the summer Olympics, but Moose tracking was not.
Canadians also have a fig leaf on their national flag. I belive this symbolizes that Canada is a complete country that is a nudist colony as well. Again, this is also the same country that produces great people like Alex Trebek and Colin Mocherie. Picture them nude. Good luck getting that image out of your head.
So because of the bitterness of moose tracking not being declared an official sport, the "eh?" controversy, the rough stance with the US, and the flagrant nudity, Canada's population has since been plummeting. That is why they are known as a the country that started, but nobody came.
That answer was waaaay too long.
Shy or outgoing: Both and neither
Chocolate or white milk?: root beer milk!
Root beer or Dr. Pepper? This is the dumbest choice question ever.
Mud or Jello wrestling?: lava wrestling. Instant win!
Are you better at talking or listening? I am deaf and mute.
Vanilla or Chocolate? I find this question to be racist, and refuse to answer it.
skiing or snowboarding?: Either way, people have accidents or die.
Day or Night?: Noon
Summer or winter: Fall
Cake or pie?: A piece of a slice!
Silver or gold?: Both are flimsy, so I say Titanium
Diamond or Pearl: Pokemon sucks.
Sunset or Sunrise? Sunrise, Sunset....Sunrise, Sunset....Sunrise, Sunset. If I were a rick man. Didle Didle Dee Deedle Deedle Deele Dum...All day long I'd Biddy Biddy Bum.....
Have you ever broke/sprained/fractured a bone? Yes, my trom.
Do you have any piercings? Yes. A headache.
Do you wear any rings?: I am poor, thanks for reminding me of that!
What is/are your favorite music person(s)? Rick Astley
What do you dream about? sleeping
Do you have a HUGE crush on someone right now? No, especially since I have no idea who Someone is.
Who is the loudest person(s)you know? Chuck Norris. When he whispers, he can be heard around the world. Twice.
who is the quietest person you know? The stupid mime who won't leave me alone!
Who do you tell your dreams too? Rick Astley
sk8ers or bikers: I am on a quest to throw everyone into a volcano who spells skaters that way.
Fav. Quote at the moment: You misunderestimated me.
Fav. Book you ever read: Richard Scaary's Best Rainy Day Book Ever
Best movie(s) ever: Super Mario Bros. and Magical Mystery Tour.
1. IF YOU COULD BUILD A HOUSE ANYWHERE, WHERE WOULD IT BE? In my yard. Stupid Question.
2. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ARTICLE OF CLOTHING? I prefer ones that clothe.
3. FAVORITE PHYSICAL FEATURE OF THE OPPOSITE SEX? No man-parts.
4. WHAT'S THE LAST CD YOU BOUGHT? Strong Bad Sings, and Other Type Hits
5. WHERE'S YOUR FAVORITE PLACE TO BE? My happy place.
6. WHERE'S YOUR LEAST FAVORITE PLACE TO BE? Here, doing these stupid surveys.
7. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE PLACE TO BE MASSAGED? At home. Oh.... WHAT place.....
8. STRONG IN MIND OR STRONG IN BODY? I'm just strong. Get used to it.
9. WHAT TIME DO YOU WAKE IN THE MORNING? When I open my eyes.
10. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE KITCHEN APPLIANCE? The sink! Good times there.
11. WHAT MAKES YOU REALLY ANGRY? Any surveys like this that get forwarded to me.
12. IF YOU COULD PLAY ANY INSTRUMENT, WHAT WOULD IT BE? I can, but I want to be an honorary kazoo blower!
13. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE COLOR? Not purple.
14. WHICH DO YOU PREFER, SPORTS CAR OR SUV? A practical one, which is neither of those.
15. DO YOU BELIEVE IN AFTERLIFE? You mean the sequel to second life?
16. FAVORITE CHILDREN'S BOOK? 100 Places You Need to go Before You Die. I know its a children's book because I saw it in the toys section at Baal Mart.
17. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON? Pepper
18. WHAT'S YOUR LEAST FAVORITE HOUSEHOLD ITEM? Debt
19. IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPER POWER, WHAT WOULD IT BE? The ability to have the person implode who creates these.
20. IF YOU HAVE A TATTOO, WHAT IS IT? You mean Fantasy Island?
21. CAN YOU JUGGLE? Responsibilities, yes.
22. THE ONE PERSON FROM YOUR PAST YOU WISH YOU COULD GO BACK AND TALK TO? Myself
23. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE DAY? Sunday
24. WHAT'S IN THE TRUNK OF YOUR CAR? Incriminating Evidence....holy monkey, I said too much.
25. WHICH DO YOU PREFER, SUSHI OR HAMBURGER? Chicken
26. OF THE PEOPLE YOU E-MAILED THIS TO, WHO'S MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? I do not subject people to this horror
27. WHO'S LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Myself
28. WHAT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY? The day that comes after the eve of April Fool's Day.
29. WHAT'S YOUR FULL NAME? The Allengator Extrodinaire Awexome Jawsnapper, Sr. Esq. with Bubba, the Talking Kazoo.
30. IF YOU COULD DO ONE THING, WHAT WOULD IT BE? Go back in time and tell myself not to do this.